Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
