i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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