Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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