READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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