I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
