JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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