We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
