i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
