Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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