a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
