it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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