I think I can smell my own vagina right now
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
