ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
