I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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