**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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