Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
