We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
