ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
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you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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