i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
