I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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