Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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