It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
