Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
false alarm, still single
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
