i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
the day after is always just damage control
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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