it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize
