Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
