woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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