absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
