I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
