TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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