yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I can text with my tongue
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
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