this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize