I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
A bitchslap is in order.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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