Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
