just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
