Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
