I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
