dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
