its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
