well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
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I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I'm having to shit out rocks
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