Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
