no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
