I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
