I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
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Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
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you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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