i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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