chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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