Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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