For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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