I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
