ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
